Site icon Anam Baile

A Life Left Unattended

Irish house sketch

“Home is a name, a word, it is a strong one; stronger than magician ever spoke, or spirit ever answered to, in the strongest conjuration.”

Charles Dickens

My husband and I were living quite contently in Manhattan when we discovered we were expecting our first child. Being aware of the great sacrifice Mother’s make to their children I believed I was simply not cut out for such an adventure. Despite all the precautions, the universe thought otherwise. Although I know many families happily raise their children in the city, for me I wanted a little piece of green. I big backyard for flowers, herb garden and fresh tomatoes. Without millions, that was not to be offered us in Manhattan. So we began looking at transfer options with my husbands company. We decided on Utah and off we went. We bought an adorable little “starter home” on a little over an acre. We planted our first garden and adopted our first dog. I set about happily filling our home with thrift store finds. Soon our little blessing was born and being a stay at home Mom was not so difficult. I began making bows and selling them on Ebay. I created a website and a craft room/playroom. I was becoming content with my little piece of the world. When my first born was only 15 months, I developed a nasty case of the “flu” that lasted for weeks on end. That “flu” turned out to be baby blessing number 2. I was sick the whole pregnancy with little energy for much of anything. When our lovely angel arrived, depression and anxiety set in. Life became about keeping my children safe and healthy and I had no desire for anything else. Now time has passed and it seems the chemicals in my brain are slowly functioning as intended and I find myself with almost 3 years of a home and life left unattended. I am ready for change. This is my journey.

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